Dissociation 101: Your Simple and Quick Guide
Imagine sitting in a coffee shop, the smell of freshly brewed espresso drifting through the sounds of the chatter of people around you. Sun is coming through the window, its warm glow blanketing everything it touches. Suddenly, you feel foggy, like you’re floating above your current reality. The sounds fade into a distant hum, the warmth feels like a brick wall between you and the rest of the world, and you’re no longer fully there. This is one version of dissociation.
What is Dissociation?
Have you ever felt like a ghost in your own life? You know on some level that it’s you there, but you don’t really feel there. If so, you may be experiencing dissociation. Dissociation is a complex, and often misunderstood, response to trauma.
Simply put, dissociation is the natural tendency to separate yourself from the present during times of extreme stress. It is the disconnection of the physical, mental, emotional, and sensory realities.
As Dr. Jamie Marich points out, dissociation is a normal human experience. We all practice detachment, and we all have parts of ourselves that make up the entire whole. So let’s explore the facets of dissociation, what dissociation might look like for you, and what (if anything) should be done about it.
The Spectrum of Dissociation
If you’ve read any of the books or seen any of the movies and TV shows offering fictionalized, sensationalized accounts of dissociative disorders (looking at you, Sybil), you have been exposed to examples of this misunderstanding. Media portrayals tend to depict severe and less than realistic takes of one dissociative disorder in particular - Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) - painting it as a problematic, unpredictable, extreme condition whose victims are in a nearly constant state of amnesia, prone to violent outbursts, and completely unaware of their internal experiences.
Does that version of dissociation exist? Maybe, I honestly don’t know, and I’m okay with that for now. What I do know is that dissociation describes a set of nuanced experiences that exist on a spectrum of varying duration, intensity, and characteristics.
On the mild end, it can include daydreaming or getting lost in a book or movie. These experiences are common and happen to pretty much everyone. On the more severe end, dissociation can manifest as distinct identities or personality states within an individual’s system, or severe depersonalization or derealization (explained below), which can significantly impact one’s ability to function.
Moderate dissociation, however, lies somewhere in between. Instances like losing track of time, zoning out during conversations, or feeling like you’re watching yourself from outside of your body are all forms of dissociation. You may know something happened on a cognitive level, but simultaneously experience a gap in your memory. You know you went to that concert a couple years ago, but you don’t actually remember being there. You’re sure you broke your arm when you were 12, but the experience is more than foggy when you try to recollect it.
Types of Dissociation
There are several types of dissociation, each with unique characteristics and symptoms. Understanding these types can help identify and address dissociative experiences more effectively.
Depersonalization: This involves feeling detached from yourself, as if you're an outside observer of your thoughts, feelings, or body. People experiencing depersonalization might describe it as feeling like they're in a dream or not fully present in their own life.
Derealization: Involves feeling like the world around you is not real or is distorted. Objects might seem strange or unfamiliar, and the environment may appear foggy or dreamlike. This can lead to a sense of disconnection from reality.
Dissociative Amnesia: Characterized by the inability to recall important personal information, usually following trauma or severe stress. This is not the same as ordinary forgetting; the memories are often too distressing to recall consciously.
Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID): Formerly known as multiple personality disorder, DID involves experiencing two or more distinct identities or personality states. Each identity may have its own name, age, history, and characteristics. Transitions between identities are often triggered by stress or trauma.
Why Do We Dissociate?
Dissociation is often linked to trauma, especially during childhood. It begins as an adaptive coping mechanism; when what is happening (or not happening) around us is too much to handle by ourselves, retreating into the mind is the only option for escape. It’s a form of compartmentalization that separates us from an unbearable reality.
Chronic traumatic experiences habituate dissociation. Over time, we strengthen the neural pathways that keep us checked out (and safe) from our surroundings. We learn to numb ourselves as a form of self-preservation.
The problem lies here: In childhoods where dissociation is required on a regular basis, it’s unlikely that there are opportunities between stressful experiences to actually acknowledge and process what’s going on. This turns what started as a temporary survival strategy into a way of being.
Symptoms of Dissociation
Recognizing dissociation is tricky, because, as alluded to earlier, it varies widely from person to person. That said, some common symptoms include:
Feeling Disconnected from Yourself: This can manifest as feeling like you're watching yourself from outside your body, feeling like you're in a dream, or having an altered sense of your own body.
Memory Gaps: These gaps are typically related to personal information or past events. You might find it difficult to recall significant moments from your life, especially those related to trauma or stress.
Emotional Numbness or Detachment: You might feel detached from your emotions, as if you're unable to experience feelings fully. This can lead to difficulties in relationships and social interactions.
Difficulty Concentrating: Dissociation can make it hard to focus on tasks or conversations, leading to a sense of "fogginess" or being on autopilot. This can feel like going through the motions without a firm grasp on what you’re doing.
Altered Perception of Reality: This includes feeling like the world around you is not real, strange, or distorted. This may feel like being separated from your environment by an invisible wall.
Impact on Daily Life
Dissociation can significantly impact daily life, affecting relationships, work, and overall well-being. People who frequently dissociate might struggle with:
Maintaining Relationships: Emotional detachment can make it difficult to connect with others, leading to feelings of isolation and loneliness. It’s common to feel like intimacy is just out of reach. You’re physically there with your loved ones, but there’s something holding you back.
Alienation: Without widespread awareness of dissociations and its many manifestations, individuals are likely to be silent about what they’re experiencing. This can lead to the idea that something is wrong with them, while what they’re experiencing is actually quite normal.
Confusion: The challenge to remember significant life events can lead to confusion about who you are, what you’ve experienced, and what has happened around you.
Job Performance: Difficulty concentrating and experiencing memory gaps can impair job performance and lead to misunderstandings or conflicts at work.
Self-Identity: Dissociation can result in struggling with the awareness that you are experiencing only a piece of your whole self. Severe dissociation, especially DID, can disrupt a person's sense of identity, making it challenging to maintain a consistent sense of self.
Mental Health: Chronic dissociation is often linked to other mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and PTSD, compounding the challenges faced by individuals.
How to Manage Dissociation
Managing dissociation involves a combination of self-help strategies, professional therapy, and support from loved ones. Because dissociative experiences are so unique, these techniques will likely vary from person to person. Here are some effective approaches to start with:
Grounding Techniques
Grounding techniques are simple exercises that help you stay connected to the present moment. These techniques can be especially helpful during a dissociative episode:
Breathing Exercises: Focus on your breath, taking slow, deep breaths. Pay attention to the sensation of air entering and leaving your lungs.
Sensory Awareness: Engage your senses by noticing the textures, smells, and sounds around you. Hold a textured object, sniff a familiar scent, or listen to ambient sounds.
Physical Movement: Engage in physical activities that require focus, such as yoga, stretching, or walking. Feeling your body move can help ground you in the present.
Mindfulness Practices
Regular mindfulness or meditation practices can help you stay present and reduce the frequency of dissociative episodes. Mindfulness involves paying attention to the present moment without judgment. Techniques include:
Body Scan Meditation: Focus on different parts of your body, noticing sensations without trying to change them.
Mindful Breathing: Pay attention to your breath, observing each inhale and exhale without trying to control them.
Mindful Walking: Walk slowly, paying attention to the sensation of your feet touching the ground and the movement of your body.
Therapy
Working with a therapist, especially one trained in trauma and dissociation, can help you understand and manage your symptoms. EMDR has been found particularly helpful for folks who experience dissociation. EMDR therapy includes establishing skills for safety and stabilization to enhance present-moment accessibility, as well as structured, evidenced-based protocols for processing traumatic memories that contributed to dissociative coping techniques.
When to Seek Help
While occasional dissociation can be a normal response to stress, frequent or severe dissociation that interferes with daily life should be addressed with professional help. A mental health professional can provide a proper diagnosis and create a treatment plan tailored to your needs.
Conclusion
Dissociation is a complex and often misunderstood phenomenon. By understanding its types, causes, and symptoms, and by learning effective management strategies, you can take steps towards better mental health. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, and with the right support, you can regain control and live a fulfilling life. If you or someone you know is struggling with dissociation, reach out to a mental health professional today.
Whether you're dealing with mild dissociation or more severe forms, there are resources and support available to help you navigate this challenging aspect of mental health. Don't hesitate to seek help and take the first step towards understanding and managing dissociation.
